Weekend Assignment #77: When I Grow Up

Weekend Assignment #77: What do you want to be when you grow up?

This can be answered one of two ways: You can answer by saying what you wanted to be when you were a kid, or, you can answer by saying what you still want to be, one day, one way or another. It's up to you.

This may sound incredibly lame and somewhat mundane in this day and age but I wanted to be nothing more than a homemaker when I grew up. This is not the same thing as a housewife. Ye Gods! Who on earth wants to be married to a house? I can think of plenty of more interesting diversions as residing lady of the house than being subservient to a house, being little more than a slave dusting, performing unnecessary tasks past the reasonable requirements for a comfortable, clean home. All I ever wanted to be was the woman who remained at home, in charge of the household and depended upon to be there when my children returned home from school and to greet my husband with a passionate kiss and a well-mixed Manhattan upon his return from work after a long, but successful day.

I would've had lots of projects and interests going on to keep me happily busy while my family was away at school and work and had the luxury of thinking about starting dinner around 3 pm. I wanted to be a stable, dependable presence; this was all I knew of my childhood with my mother who never worked after she married and even so, was one of the most interesting women I've ever had the pleasure to know. I wanted nothing more than to continue in her footsteps and, hopefully, do half as good a job. When my family grew older and more involved in interests outside the home, I would've pursued outside activities that interested me such as taking classes about whatever piqued my fancy, shelving books in the local library or offering my time doing something worthwhile with senior citizens or volunteering at the hospital.

Extra Credit: What did your parents want you to be when you grew up?

My parents wanted me to be a happy, well-adjusted person capable of adjusting to and handling the complexities of this thing called life. They wanted to be sure that I learned a skill(s) that would enable me to provide for myself if needs be. They did this by funding my business school education following my high school graduation. The rest was up to me. My parents have been absent from my life for almost ten years now and to this day, I still hope I continue to make them proud of me and never want to let them down. It never ends, this desire for approval, and this may be tantamount to a major ingredient to a successful life.

A Matter of Trust

Here's something to consider--

These days, there's not a whole lot out there one can count on and trust. We don't trust strangers, politicians, perhaps some of our neighbors and, unfortunately, possibly some members of our family. In a nation that has become fearful and suspicious of the unknown, there remains a daily event in which extreme basic trust among the human race is alive and well. Though we may not realize it, those of us who merge onto a freeway or main thoroughfare which takes us to work every day place a huge amount of trust in our fellow man. Nowhere have I ever before witnessed such a complete assumption of trust than seated behind the wheel of my car, driving along at a good clip en route to work. There I am in my very little car with assorted vehicles in front, in back, to the left and, sometimes, to the right of me. We are all placing our trust (our lives, actually) in the hands (on the wheel) and feet (on the gas and brake pedals) of these strangers driving along with us.

Having meandered along the backroads to get to work for the past 16 years or so at a relaxed pace, my perspective of the daily commute is fresher than those who are jaded to years of zipping along in a like manner. We're trusting everyone behind the wheel got enough sleep last night to function properly. We're trusting they're not still hung over from a big night out. We trusting they're not so worried or consumed by a major personal problem that they're unable to concentrate on the task of driving responsibly. We're trusting that they're not too busy chatting on the phone, looking up directions, eating breakfast, applying makeup, being distracted by noisy kids in the back seat...the list could go on forever. Scary, isn't it? But rather awesome as well.

Saturday Six - Episode 74

http://journals.aol.com/pattboy92/PatricksPlace/entries/1281

1. You find out that you have to appear on a daytime talk show. It doesn't matter whose show you choose, but you must appear on one. Which show would you pick and why? I don't watch any daytime talk shows but I'll pick "Oprah" because I like her and am impressed with what she's done with her life. It would be much easier to pick which one I wouldn't be caught dead on!

2. Have you ever joined an online dating or penpal site? No, I haven't. If so, have you kept in touch with anyone that you met there; if not, have you ever thought about joining up? No, I have no need to do so.

3. Who was the last person you promised you'd keep in touch with following a move or job change? That would be all the residents and staff I bid farewell to when I left my last job on August 9th. Have you kept in touch? Not yet but I plan to visit them sometime next weekend to say hello.

4. Take this quiz: What pizza best describes your personality?

Cheese Pizza

Traditional and comforting.
You focus on living a quality life.
You're not easily impressed with novelty.
Yet, you easily impress others.

5. You're having dinner with friends at a restaurant. Besides the company, what is the most important part of the meal: the appetizer, the drinks, the salad, the entree, or the dessert? Probably the entree because it's only when I dine out that I order something like Prime Rib or New York steak and these selections are always a special treat for me.

6. Have you ever submitted a Reader's Choice question to the "Saturday Six?" Yes, once. If so, did the answers surprise you? No, it was pretty much a pedestrian question. If not, why haven't you?

A Lesson For All of Us

Katrina. Up until recently, all this name meant to me was the object of Ichabod Crane's affections in The Legend of Sleepy Hollow. How quickly things change. The surprise, the despair, the disgust and the outrage concerning the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina have been pretty well covered. I have nothing new to add that hasn't already been said.

I've read several entries in journals in which the writers state they feel "guilty" for enjoying a hot meal, a warm bed and a roof over their heads as they struggle with the knowledge of the loss and suffering of so many in this cataclysm of nature. This is a sympathetic, understandable reaction but what I feel is not guilt. What I do feel is a heightened sense of gratefulness that I nor any of my friends or family were victims of this catastrophe. It has given me a renewed sense of appreciation for all the wonderful things I have and where I live. I also see a warning, a wake-up call.

Where I live, we don't expect hurricanes. This is earthquake country and the occurance of a major earthquake is anticipated, expected but when? None of us know but we do know it's coming. I see how New Orleans has been all but swept off the map and the same could happen here. If nothing else, one good thing that should come from this horrific disaster in the south is the realization that we all should be prepared in the event of an emergency. What fools we would be if this incident didn't open our eyes once and for all and teach us a lesson. That being at the very least making some sort of effort to think of a plan of escape, gather together supplies to carry one's family through for at least several days in case of an unexpected event. That is what an emergency is...an unexpected event. There's no warning headline in the morning newspaper, no mention of it on the TV or radio, no means of knowing ahead of time.

I see this disaster as a blaring, not to be ignored message that it's time to put all our thoughts of good intention into action. It's time to begin storing away gallon containers of water. It's time to purchase an extra can or two of items with infinite shelf life while doing weekly shopping and stowing them away in a designated safe spot. A bit of warning seems to precede hurricanes; not so with earthquakes. One minute the earth is terra and firma, the next, it's roiling and rolling and all hell begins to break loose. I've yet to experience a big earthquake in my 29 years in this state. Oh yes, lots of little ones and I certainly felt the Loma Prieta, CA quake of 1986 and my house is a long way from where its epicenter was. If this tragedy gives us nothing else, at least let it serve as a graphic example of what could happen more quickly than we can possibly realize and let us learn from it and be better prepared for that which we know will eventually come.

Sunday Seven - Episode 1

http://journals.aol.com/pattboy92/PatricksPlace/entries/1275

"The Sunday Seven" will feature a single question with seven answers.  Sometimes, you'll have to rank seven things, other times you'll have to list seven things you come up with on your own to answer the question.

 Here, in alphabetical order, are The Seven Deadly Sins: 

Anger, Envy, Gluttony, Greed, Lust, Pride and Sloth

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION:
Rank the seven sins in the order that you most often commit them, one being the sin you're usually most guilty of, seven being the sin you're usually least guilty of.

1.  Pride  2.  Envy  3.  Sloth  4.  Lust 5.  Gluttony  6.  Greed  7.  Anger

 

Saturday Six - Episode 73

1. What is the price of gas at your regular station?  It was $3.05 when I passed by about two hours ago.  It's probably up to $3.10 by now.  Have you made any changes to holiday plans because of gas prices?  Not really because we don't usually make plans to travel any great distance on holiday weekends.

2. Some people feel that the song that was #1 when they were born somehow helps shape their life.  Which song was #1 when you were born, according to this site.  Alas, I'm so old I have to go with what was the #1 song on my 18th birthday and it was "How Can You Mend A Broken Heart"by The Bee Gees.  Do you think it relates to your life at all?  Not at all; I received my engagement ring on my 18th birthday and my heart was bursting with love and it still is.

3. Take this quiz:  Which child does it say you are?  You Are Likely a First Born  Is it correct about your birth order?  It's totally incorrect; I am the last child of four.  The choices of answers to the questions in this quiz were so bad it's no wonder the answer was so inaccurate.

4. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #61 from De:  What animal do you equate your spirit with and why? 

  I chose the butterfly because I very much think of myself as someone who emerged from a cocoon into a person of value and interest.  When I clicked on the Animal Totem site and checked out the butterfly, I liked the sentence which states:  "It may take some time being alone with ourselves to listen to Butterfly's gentle requests that we allow the natural transformation of things in our lives." 

I have always thought of myself as a late bloomer.

5. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #62 from Psychfun:  If you had to describe your personality as a nut (as in the eatable kind) what nut would you be and why?  A pistachio; a little bit harder to crack but the meat inside is sweet.

6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #63 from Chris:   Who knows the "real" you better - - your real world friends or your Jland readers?  My real world friends

 

On The Job

Two weeks into the job and the fog continues to clear. I've been suffering from "brain stretch". For those of you who wear glasses, remember how your eyes felt when they're adjusting to a new prescription? I've always described it as the sensation of my eyes being pulled or stretched. This is how my brain has felt for the past two weeks. So much information, so much to process and remember; now, I'm mentally exhausted.

I've been working the last two weekends in order to receive extra orientation from the woman who's been filling in doing this job before me. I have one day off tomorrow and then I'm back at it Tuesday. On my own. Alone. Am I ready? Well, certainly more so than I was on my first day. I don't know my way around the entire campus (I've been told by more than one person this takes four to six months)! I do know where I need to go to deliver my med passes to homes. I do recognize and know the names of 23 residents. Gee! Only 277 more to get to know and remember. My biggest stumbling block is going to be dealing with the phone in the clinic. The receptionist picks up calls most of the time and the nurses help out too. If they're out or occupied elsewhere, which seems to be a lot of the time, it's up to me. This phone rings constantly.

The Phone. My old nemesis is back to haunt me. I have such an irrational fear and loathing of the telephone that I've aided and abetted for years. I especially don't like answering phones when the person on the other end is going to be asking questions for which I have no answers. This is what I have to look forward to on Tuesday. One of the major perks (to me) of my last job was that we caregivers never had to answer the phones. When I began working the early morning hours, the phone would ring occasionally at the front desk but it was always the same lady requesting bathroom assistance. No problem there. I hate to initiate calls as well. If I have to make a call to a serviceman, insurance company or clear up some kind of problem on my day off when I have time, that day is shot to hell and I'm miserable until this chore is behind me. I think the way my body reacts to interaction with the telephone is what I imagine a panic attack to be like. My heart begins to beat rapidly, my hands begin to sweat and I often develop a tendency to stutter somewhat. I realize these reactions to a modern convenience that so many people hold near and dear are foolish. I can't help how I feel. For all I know there may be an offical name for this phobia.

My family is all too familiar with my phone phobia. I'm often the target of mild, affectionate teasing and more than likely, private thoughts of being pathetically lame in this department. They simply cannot comprehend how I can feel this way. Knowledge that I'd have to deal with phones was one of the things that almost kept me from accepting my new position. I decided to accept this as a major challenge, however, in hopes that I would become more comfortable over time. And just think, for the first six years of my working life I worked as a secretary and had to deal with phones, multiple lines, etc. Throughout it all, my stomach tied itself in a knot each time those phones rang.

Wish me luck. Even as I read over what I've written here, I've been doing a little better with the telephone than my entry here implies. I have a long way to go. Lately, my personal motto has been "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". For me, this has been a most appropriate motto to live by these past several weeks.